My life is far richer because of all the phases I’ve been through. I think the whole “be an expert in one thing” goal is driven by patriarchy and capitalism. It’s hard to make money from someone who changes their mind about what they want to do every few weeks.
I definitely think so too!! I always remember that quote by Baz Luhrmann - “Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you wanna do with your life; the most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives; some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.” In fact, having passed 40 a while ago, I’d say the most interesting people are those who refuse to be defined by any narrow set of definitions.
There’s a scene in a Jennifer Lopez movie (Monster-in-Law I think) where she invites a guy back to her apartment and it’s a total mess and he says something like “Did you just move in?” and Jennifer says, “No, it’s just life is too short to live the same day twice.” She’s a dog walker and yoga instructor and artist and caterer and all kinds of other stuff. I’ve always loved that!
Yep totally! I know a few people like that in real life and I usually get on super well with them/ love listening about their experiences. In a different life I might have been one of those people.
"Would you rather be sophisticated and have the whole world consider you a dunce, or would you rather be basic but have everyone convinced you’re peak sophistication?" Essentially Apollo's curse of Cassandra. As you put it, it certainly pits our social nature versus other principles, but I do wonder just how far "curating" is just another guise of consumerism, because no one is actually faced with the choice you propose.
Of course, I didn’t mean to imply that’s the choice. The question was meant to help us consider what it is we value.
I think curation can certainly be consumerist but isn’t necessarily so. I have friends (and I make overtures in this direction myself) who are passionate about rescuing old things and giving them new life, inheriting from friends as they move, repurposing each other’s unwanted gifts, hunting around thrift stores or consignment stores, making their own stuff in craft workshops, buying things from small local artisans at home or during travels. All of these can involve a financial component (you pay the small artisan, you pay for the craft class that taught you how to decorate a lampshade) but are different from consumerism in that they favor the human side over the corporate - things can be rescued, inherited, loved, repurposed, repaired, embellished, basically made part of our human process of being a person, rather than just picked out of a catalogue where they have been mass produced by inadequately rewarded mistreated employees, based on designs that rip off small artisans and pretend to have that human quality while aiming to achieve it at the lowest cost and with the lowest material quality possible, and calculated to break down on you readily so you are ready for the next round of purchasing.
I have found it much harder to part with items I have gained by the first method than those gained by the second, I’m willing to put in more effort to help them continue to thrive.
Right. The things you mention here are personal - they’re the books you pick one by one for your shelf, not the bulk purchase of books by the meter. I thought that was the use you were making of the term “curation” at that part of your post.
Yeah, that’s part of it for sure. I was aiming to explore the difference between letting yourself go through all these phases as a person and then letting your environment be an extension of that - the books you loved at 20, the art you loved at 15, all of it growing into a sort of ‘museum of self’ that will not always be aesthetically cohesive but will tell anyone browsing it a lot about the fabric of your soul, if you will. Versus creating a sleek designer space that maybe objectively looks better and more ‘impressive’ in some way but doesn’t really give away anything about you because that’s not what it was selected to do. Like I have been in many people’s homes that adhere strongly to one or the other of these two principles and although type 2 homes are undoubtedly beautiful, I have never felt comfortable in them. And though type 1 homes may look a little rough sometimes they immediately feel like a second home. Have you had that experience at all?
Hahaha yeah my friends and family definitely tend to be the Type 1 crowd, or hybrid. I do have one Type 2 aunt, she’s still a super nice person but I always feel weird in her apartment. It’s like an IKEA catalogue came to life.
I think phases are beautiful! Why would I want to lie on my deathbed wishing that I'd tried X, Y and Z but was afraid to do so? We all deserve to constantly engage in the act of discovery or homing in on who we truly are.
Right? I have received SO - MUCH - FLAK (and continue to, up to a point) for being quick to move from thing to thing but it has definitely brought me nothing but good stuff. And you can always go back!
I am not a "Swiftie" myself but I think one of the things she's contributed to the culture is the idea that we have "eras". It may be everywhere right now in ways that might be annoying but I think it gives honor/validation to our phases in a way that was only dismissed previously. Most of us will live six, seven, eight decades ... may we embrace many phases!
My life is far richer because of all the phases I’ve been through. I think the whole “be an expert in one thing” goal is driven by patriarchy and capitalism. It’s hard to make money from someone who changes their mind about what they want to do every few weeks.
I definitely think so too!! I always remember that quote by Baz Luhrmann - “Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you wanna do with your life; the most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives; some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.” In fact, having passed 40 a while ago, I’d say the most interesting people are those who refuse to be defined by any narrow set of definitions.
There’s a scene in a Jennifer Lopez movie (Monster-in-Law I think) where she invites a guy back to her apartment and it’s a total mess and he says something like “Did you just move in?” and Jennifer says, “No, it’s just life is too short to live the same day twice.” She’s a dog walker and yoga instructor and artist and caterer and all kinds of other stuff. I’ve always loved that!
Yep totally! I know a few people like that in real life and I usually get on super well with them/ love listening about their experiences. In a different life I might have been one of those people.
The older I get the more convinced I am that everything is just infinite process. All becoming, no being. The pleasure is in the flow.
‘It’s all becoming’ - absolutely, I think so too. It’s kind of wonderful when you think about it.
"Would you rather be sophisticated and have the whole world consider you a dunce, or would you rather be basic but have everyone convinced you’re peak sophistication?" Essentially Apollo's curse of Cassandra. As you put it, it certainly pits our social nature versus other principles, but I do wonder just how far "curating" is just another guise of consumerism, because no one is actually faced with the choice you propose.
Of course, I didn’t mean to imply that’s the choice. The question was meant to help us consider what it is we value.
I think curation can certainly be consumerist but isn’t necessarily so. I have friends (and I make overtures in this direction myself) who are passionate about rescuing old things and giving them new life, inheriting from friends as they move, repurposing each other’s unwanted gifts, hunting around thrift stores or consignment stores, making their own stuff in craft workshops, buying things from small local artisans at home or during travels. All of these can involve a financial component (you pay the small artisan, you pay for the craft class that taught you how to decorate a lampshade) but are different from consumerism in that they favor the human side over the corporate - things can be rescued, inherited, loved, repurposed, repaired, embellished, basically made part of our human process of being a person, rather than just picked out of a catalogue where they have been mass produced by inadequately rewarded mistreated employees, based on designs that rip off small artisans and pretend to have that human quality while aiming to achieve it at the lowest cost and with the lowest material quality possible, and calculated to break down on you readily so you are ready for the next round of purchasing.
I have found it much harder to part with items I have gained by the first method than those gained by the second, I’m willing to put in more effort to help them continue to thrive.
Right. The things you mention here are personal - they’re the books you pick one by one for your shelf, not the bulk purchase of books by the meter. I thought that was the use you were making of the term “curation” at that part of your post.
Yeah, that’s part of it for sure. I was aiming to explore the difference between letting yourself go through all these phases as a person and then letting your environment be an extension of that - the books you loved at 20, the art you loved at 15, all of it growing into a sort of ‘museum of self’ that will not always be aesthetically cohesive but will tell anyone browsing it a lot about the fabric of your soul, if you will. Versus creating a sleek designer space that maybe objectively looks better and more ‘impressive’ in some way but doesn’t really give away anything about you because that’s not what it was selected to do. Like I have been in many people’s homes that adhere strongly to one or the other of these two principles and although type 2 homes are undoubtedly beautiful, I have never felt comfortable in them. And though type 1 homes may look a little rough sometimes they immediately feel like a second home. Have you had that experience at all?
Yes, but very, very rarely in type 2. That group does not like me on the whole.
Hahaha yeah my friends and family definitely tend to be the Type 1 crowd, or hybrid. I do have one Type 2 aunt, she’s still a super nice person but I always feel weird in her apartment. It’s like an IKEA catalogue came to life.
Love this.
⭐️🙏
I think phases are beautiful! Why would I want to lie on my deathbed wishing that I'd tried X, Y and Z but was afraid to do so? We all deserve to constantly engage in the act of discovery or homing in on who we truly are.
Right? I have received SO - MUCH - FLAK (and continue to, up to a point) for being quick to move from thing to thing but it has definitely brought me nothing but good stuff. And you can always go back!
I am not a "Swiftie" myself but I think one of the things she's contributed to the culture is the idea that we have "eras". It may be everywhere right now in ways that might be annoying but I think it gives honor/validation to our phases in a way that was only dismissed previously. Most of us will live six, seven, eight decades ... may we embrace many phases!